The day

There is a day when it gets just so tiring of repeating the same things over and over again. The day when it gets too much that it doesn't give out any feeling anymore. For the time being, let just treasure the best we could. Dear young hearts, you'll always the special ones. I don't want to just get through the day. But I would want us to make the best out of each moment. And I know, it is a cyclic feeling. They will come and go but the moments and memories will stay forever.

Those anticipated moments

When I was in my primary and secondary schools, I was in blue sports team. I guess, that was a kind of sign for the things that is happening now. Teaching year 4 Tun Hussein, who are in the blue sport team too, sparks an unforgettable experience that touches the deepest part of the soul.  

One of the most anticipated things in school is my pupils, or better pronounce as my former pupils. I just don't know why I always have this strong feeling inside towards them. Perhaps, those three months together engraved so much memories. I won't deny it that there were days when things were so bitter that I couldn't hold my tears any more, if I could, I would want to just get over with everything that moment, but my heart doesn't want to give them up. I remember some of the first moments together which was on the 'Sorry Party'. I am totally in awe of how they managed to get it done. That was the first time when I failed to hold on myself that I just burst out of the class when the lesson ended and didn't talk to any of them. I knew that was so immature sulking act ever. But things were directed in the other way around and it touched my heart a lot. They came out with a plan to throw a party for me. They even had the floor plan which was photocopied for all the class members. They collected money and bought boxes of KFC. They made a banner, arranged themselves in rows, asked me to stand outside of the class and waited for the surprises behind the door and all sorts of things to ensure the party will be a success. That day, I was speechless, feel awkward, and in total awe. And that was the day when I just feel that they are more than the special ones for me. I might not talk or close to all of them, but I am assure that we have that strong feeling inside. Every now and then, they always brighten the days especially in this toughest month and those coming ones. I guess all of us, the final semester trainees will have that feeling of being overloaded inside. But just a simple greeting and smile from the young ones, it breaks through everything. And I couldn't deny that I miss them all a little bit more each day.

For the 3 weeks left with them, I just want to treasure and cherish everything. They will always be the special ones in my heart for when I look back at our memories, my heart smiles. 

TEACHING JOURNAL - WEEK 12

As future educator, it is important for me to develop my proficiency in many aspects, such as knowledge about my major subject, various language skills as well as the life skills and to widen my experiences through the exposures in the journey as a teacher trainee. By going through the 3 phases of teaching practice, it helps me to widen my perspectives in viewing the ‘real teaching world’.

In this third teaching practice in SK Green Road, I had encountered various types of real situations in teaching world which some I never expect at all. I admit that there were days where things were just so challenging and I did feel like giving up. However, through every hurdle I managed to see the positive sides of things that were happening with the guidance given by the people around me. I believe that teaching is not easy yet I come to see that life as a teacher is a blessed one. A teacher has the power to carry some impacts especially to the young souls as well as to touch the life of others along the way.

As human, it is normal to have all the negative feelings and to experience the meltdown points. Most importantly is not to give up easily in every obstacle encountered. To be a future educator, I need to learn to be a ‘multitask person’ as teacher job is not just to teach but stretch beyond that: a manager, a recorder, a facilitator, a mediator, a coach and the list goes on. Thus, it is very essential for me to always be mentally, emotionally and physically prepared for all the things that I will be experiencing in this journey as future educator.

As I am still at the inexperience level, I admit that it was quite hard for me to cope with things around especially in managing the class and ensuring that ‘real and meaningful learning’ is taking place. I feel that it is important for teacher to develop a positive teacher-student relationship in order to create more motivating and fun learning environment. When a teacher manages to be like one, the same positive vibe will be reflected among the pupils too; that they may treat each other well too.

I have learnt that making mistake is part of the learning process. There were days when I feel that the activities conducted were quite boring, not that interactive and too far beyond the pupils’ level of proficiency. Yet, from that I learn so many things which help me to conduct more suitable and appropriate teaching and learning activities in the class.

I come to realize that the most important thing is the real intention to teach. It is not just for the sake of imparting knowledge or completing the job as a teacher but also to develop the personality sides of the pupils. A teacher is to teach and inspire young souls to become a competence individual in every aspect and also to be a ‘wise man’ in making decision in the future.

I am thankful to have wonderful mentor and lecturer who always guide me through this phase of practicum. Indeed, both of them are very experienced, supportive and dedicated! The staffs and teachers are also very cooperative and willing to lend helps at any time. The relationships fostered through the stories shared on their teaching experience inspire me in so many ways. I salute their dedication and commitment in the teaching field. They are indeed great role models. Not to forget my awesome practicum mates and course mates (PISMP TESL January 2011) for the brilliant teaching ideas shared and random jokes cracked which make each day full of happiness despite of all the workloads.

In this phase of practicum I am taking two classes; Year 4 Tun Hussein (English class) and Year 4 Tun Abdullah (PSV class). Honestly, there were days when things get so challenging; experiencing the unstable emotions, questioning the capability as a teacher, and everything that comes together in between. Yet, the moments shared with the pupils always make everything worth and it means a lot to me. Those little souls teach me how to view things differently, to be happy without reason, to be spirit-filled and energetic all the time and to appreciate every single little thing in life. Being with them for three months is only a small part of time spent in their life, but I hope the moments shared, the happiness sparked, the tears shed, and the lesson learnt will carry impacts that will last for a lifetime. I hope nothing but for each and every one of them to be great individuals someday!

Again, thank you so much to SK Green Road for this opportunity to be part of the ‘Greenians’ community. The time spent, the lesson learnt, and the memories made will be treasured in my heart forever! It is true that though the challenges were so great at times, one could discover the joy in teaching if his or her heart to teach is at the right purpose. With all my heart, I believe that this journey as Future Educator is a worth one and the ‘call’ to be a teacher is part of the blessings in my life!

1 Month left

1 month left and that's it. The same routine will begin soon in few hours. So much mix feeling inside. Trying to comfort my heart between all those thoughts. Holiday had been great but it seems that time is flying so fast this time or isn't that what is happening all these time. Despite of that, I am glad to have a little break in between. So, here it is. Four weeks left. This will be the last teaching phase for me before stepping into the real world of teaching. And this is also the longest time spent with the pupils, 12 weeks, which somehow brings so much mix feelings inside. For the time left, I wish nothing but for us to learn and discover things together as well as to have some good, meaningful and lasting memories. 

Best wishes go to all of my seniors for their posting and juniors for their first day of first phase of teaching practice tomorrow! 

3 weeks: 2nd phase of practicum

Three weeks of second phase of practicum had just ended. This time, I feel that time is flying faster than the first phase and yes I am enjoying every single moment of it. Even though with the lack of sleeping hours and too much head-cracked times trying to plan and design the lesson, but it always warm my heart seeing the joy come those young souls. I may be still at the inexperience level of teaching but I am learning to build myself as well as to find the pleasure in teaching. This time the challenges and environment are so much different than the previous one. To tackle the heart of 38 souls at a time is not easy at all. Literally, teaching seem to be easy viewing it from the point of the audience's eyes or perhaps recalling the memories back to school days. Seeing how a teacher delivers a lesson in front with talking and instructing the pupils to complete the tasks is a kind of ABC thing. But the truth, you will never imagine how difficult it is. In fact, I believe that every profession has their own struggles and walking down the path of teaching making me to see the reality of it much more deeper. Some days, it could be frustrated. Not just because of questioning the capability in teaching but also seeing the unbearable impacts glued on some hearts of learning the wrong things or perhaps just can't digest any single word uttered. Yet some days, I just can't take it not to laugh seeing the honesty portrayed, high level of energy demonstrated and playful words said by those young souls. 

Children; regardless of where they are from, they are just being them, unique and adorable in their own special ways. 

Two weeks off from practicum, I should spend some times to look for more interesting and captivating teaching ideas. For now, have your breaks pupils and see you all after the holidays, take care!

Challenge accepted!

To teach and to inspire are not easy. It needs to be learnt and I am in the process of learning them. Had my first day of practicum phase 2 today at SK Satria Jaya. Will be taking Year 2 Zamrud English KSSR class, 38 mixed ability pupils. The situation is different from my previous practicum. But whatever it is, challenge accepted! 

All the best everyone.

I miss them a lot :')

pagiku cerahku,matahari bersinar
kugendong tas merah ku di pundak
slamat pagi smua ku natikan dirimu
didepan kls mu menantikan kami

guruku tersayang guruku tercinta
tanpamu apa jadiny aku
tak bisa baca tulis mengerti banyak hal
guruku terima kasih ku

nyatanya diriku kadang buat mu marah
namun segala maaf kau berikan

slamat pagi smua ku natikan dirimu
didepan kelas mu menantikan kami

guruku tersayang guruku tercinta
tanpamu apa jadiny aku
tak bisa baca tulis mengerti banyak hal
guruku terima kasih ku

nyata diriku kadang buat mu marah
namun sgala maaf kau berikan

guruku tersayang guruku tercinta
tanpamu apa jadiny aku
tak bisa baca tulis mengerti banyak hal
guruku terima kasih ku

Listening to this song and thinking that there will be no more saying 'Good morning boys and girls' tomorrow saddened me a lot. On the last day, i purposely did not want any of my pupils to cry because with all my heart i could not stand it too if it really happens. I will be in tear too. I tried my best to handle that feeling, to hide the sadness of separation behind those smiles. At one point, i just feel so emotional inside when everyone was looking at me while i was giving my 'last' advices. Of course, it is not that we are not going to meet again like forever. But somehow, between those four weeks of practicum it has formed some kind of strong emotional attachment between me and them. Plus, they are the first group of pupils i am teaching and that what makes them so special to me. There were days when i can't stand their behaviours and i scolded as well as shouted to them. With all my heart, i was so guilty after that. But that is part of the learning process for me. I should handle by emotion carefully. Despite of all the challenges, the ups and downs, the laughs burst, the awkwardness sparked, the happiness shared, i do miss them a lot. I hope they will grow not only in their knowledge but also in their personality and life as whole.

4C & 5A, SK Tabuan, you will be miss :')

Happy Practicum !

Nothing beats than seeing the pure joy from the young souls.

I am having my first practicum in SK Tabuan Kuching from 1st of April to 26th April 2013. Will be taking two English classes, 5A & 4C, five periods in each class. Both with almost 40 pupils per class. Wish me all the best!

Hello boys and girls, I am Miss May! Nice to meet you all!